As he grows older - dropping on the floor

AX is the oldest of the three sibling. He turned 10 years old. It seems like it was only yesterday. He is 10 years old and strong. He is getting stronger day by day. I thought that somehow or eventually, things will change. I am still hoping for a change or shall I say, adaption to the environment. There are times that I can not wait for something that will suddenly come on his way. He is a beautiful boy, very kind and patient. He has a big heart. He, however, can be so focused that the world around him has to stop to give space to his ticks. For more than a year now, he has been continuously so enthused in flushing toilets, washing his hands in the sink after using the bathroom when he really did not use it at all, rushing to a closed door and trying to find the key to it and removing the scuffs on the floor. He was not like this at all before. He had some obsessive compulsive mannerisms but will eventually fade away and replaced by a new one. This time, he became so tied up with something for a long time. He persists for as long as he can. He fights people as long as he does what "needs" to be done according to him.

Today, we visited Target. We have not gone to this store for a long time. We have Walmart where we can buy affordable items. It was a happy moment at first. His father asked him to count the neatly arranged fingers. Indeed, he counted. He knows that people have 10 fingers. Hence, we asked him to count the fingers of his father properly by pointing to the well-arranged fingers. He counted 9 fingers only. He was flabbergasted and went white with fear or puzzlement. He looked at the fingers of his father anew. He counted with his eyes. We began giggling when we saw that he was so deliriously quizzed to the max why his father has 9 fingers only. He grabbed the hands of his father and tried to look at the palm. His father tried to dissuade him. Later on, he grabbed the hands of his father. There he saw that his father stealthily kept the missing finger. AX was now smiling. He realized that somehow, he was tricked. He laughed with all of us.

We continued our shopping for food. We turned to furniture corner and I was looking at the tall chairs like the ones we have. In an instant, AX looked down and saw something that looks like dirt or stain on the shiny floor. He reached for it. I saw him and told him to stand up and must not remove scuffs on the floor. He reached down again and I tried my best not for him to do these awkward things. I do not want him doing these things because they make him look stupid. Removing scuffs on the floor is not healthy for him because later on when he finds that his hands are dirty, he will lick his hands/fingers. Another reason, it takes away the precious time when he should be doing more productive tasks to help him talk. He can think and he knows right from wrong. Yet, he has this big obsession that he has to remove scuffs on the floor.

We had like more than 5-minute struggle for him to get up because he let himself fall on the floor time after time. He was hitting us while fighting to get to his obsessive task. People who were shopping, I noticed, were looking at us like we were hurting him. It was an insane struggle in the first place but we can not let him do things that are counterproductive to his health and sanity. Removing scuffs on the floor is a counterproductive task.

In the end, his father was able to raise him up and moved him away. All the while, his younger sister and brother were looking at us. They know that AX was not doing something good. His brother was telling him that the floor is dirty. Yet, AX kicked, hit, fell on the floor, turned around on the floor, screamed, cried, pushed us just to reach the scuffs that he wanted to remove. He did not listen at all to us nor to his younger brother.

We left the area and paid for our groceries.

This reminds me, what else should we do in order to break him from this counterproductive habit. He is growing older and stronger. One day, we will not be able to maneuver him like we did today after a struggle. It is hard. It is frustrating. He is our child and as much as possible we want him to act normally. Why? In this world, many people are harsh. You are judged on what you do and not on what you can do. He has so many productive tasks on his hands yet removing scuffs on the floor is beyond that. We can not let him do that no matter what people will say. It is not safe for him.